March 6, 2014

Top Ten New Table Tennis Rules I'd Like to See

Some serious, some not so serious. You judge which.

  1. No-Hidden Serve Rule Adjustment. When serving, players should be required to serve so that the ball is visible to both umpires, or where the umpires would sit if there were umpires. When there are no umpires, it would be assumed the umpires would be sitting five feet out on each side, lined up with the net. The point of the rule isn't to make sure the umpires can see the ball. The point is that if a server hides the ball from an opponent but it isn't obvious he is doing so, it'll be obvious he's hiding it from at least one of the umpires. No more hidden serve problems.
  2. Execution of Servers Who Hide Contact. For now on, on the first instance of a player hiding his serve, his opponent shall have the opportunity to slap him in the face. On the second instance, the player shall have splinters shoved under his fingernails. On the third instance, the player shall be dragged outside and executed by firing squad.
  3. More Single Elimination Events. Most tournaments feature a few round robin events, perhaps one every 200 points. In my mind, when I play an event and lose a match, I should be out of the event, but with RR events you keep on going. Why not have twice as many rating events, perhaps every 100 points, but make them single elimination? Fewer matches per event on average, but more events. (I remember playing a tournament in 1977 when I was rated 1480, and I was in Under 1500, 1600, 1700, 1800, 1900, 2000, and 2100 - all in one day! I was in the final of the three lowest events, winning U1600.)
  4. 38mm Ball, 21-point Games. I confess, I miss the way it was played the first 25 years I played. I especially miss 21-point games. I'm not a hardliner on this, but I am nostalgic.
  5. Soccer-colored Balls. We're a game of spin, but you can barely see the spin. Spectators who aren't experts have no clue what's going on. Plus many people say we need longer rallies - well, make it easier to see the spin and there'll be fewer misses off serves. Plus think how fun it would be to play with these balls! We'd gets lot of kids playing. Only downside - it's almost psychedelic playing with them. (I have a supply of these balls which I bring out when I teach spin on serves and pushes.)
  6. Additional One-Minute Timeout. Right now players get a single one-minute timeout where they usually consult with a coach. But that's not fair to coaching authors. Why not a second one-minute timeout where players can consult with a table tennis tactics book?
  7. 50% Rule. All members of USATT shall donate 50% of their salaries to USATT, where it will either be used to develop the sport in this country or it will be squandered in some highly unimaginative way.
  8. The Late No-Learn Rule. When a player shows up late for a class, the coach shall mark down what the player missed and pass this on to all other coaches in the world, with the understanding that no coach shall ever teach that player what he missed for coming in late, and that player will always have a hole in his game because of this. Additionally, all future opponents of this player shall be informed of the hole in this player's game before they play so they may play into it. Additionally, the late player shall get ten lashes.
  9. Athleticism Rule. Before a player can achieve a 2000+ rating in this Olympic sport, he must first pass the Presidential Challenge Fitness Test. (Just kidding, people - there's at least one online forum devoted mostly to combination rackets - mostly long pips and other off-surfaces - that takes these types of things a bit too seriously.)
  10. Scream Rule. Players may only scream at the top of their lungs ten times in a match. On the eleventh such scream they shall be defaulted, their rackets broken, and their tongues pulled out.

Wang Liqin: Ma Lin was a Headache

Here's the article - and no, he's not insulting him, he's talking about what it was like playing him.

Why B2B Marketers Need a Ping-Pong Plan

Here's the article, which includes a nice cats-playing-TT picture.

Drilling with a Robot

Here's a video (29 sec) showing one of the zillions of possible drills with a robot. Most of the major table tennis dealers now sell these advanced robots, but they are more expensive than the less expensive ones, which primarily hit either to one spot or randomly all over the table.

Bay Areas Trying Out for USA National Team

Here's a video (75 sec) that features the players from the SF bay area that are trying out for team at the Trials at Texas Wesleyan University, Fri-Sun, March 7-9.

A Little School Table Tennis

Here's a video (54 sec) of Adam Bobrow hitting with kids at a school. At 34 sec in he can't resist throwing in a high, sidespinning-backspinning lob.

Playing Table Tennis on Drugs!

Here's a hilarious new video (102 sec) where Australians take on Americans in "the most epic table tennis duel in history!!" (It gets really good about 17 seconds in.)

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